"But I'm not the one who needs help!"
a common phrase spoken by newcomers
For Concerned Relatives and Friends:
Please read this questionnaire to see if Families Anonymous can make a difference in your life. Ask yourself the following questions, and answer them as honestly as you can. Fill in each blank with the name of the person who is causing you concern.
1. Do you lie awake worrying about __________?
2. Do you feel frustrated in your attempts to control __________?
3. Do you disapprove of __________’s lifestyle?
4. Do you argue with __________about his or her friends?
5. Do you find it increasingly difficult to communicate with __________?
6. Does __________’s behavior have you “climbing the walls?"
7. Do you often ask, “Where have I failed?”
8. Do you feel it is necessary to protect __________because he or she is unusually sensitive?
9. Are you trying to compensate for some family misfortune, such as divorce, death or illness?
10. Are you embarrassed about discussing your situation with a relative or friend?
11. Do you find yourself lying or covering up for __________?
12. Do you feel resentful or hostile toward __________?
13. Do you find it increasingly difficult to trust __________?
14. Do you worry about __________’s behavior affecting other members of the family?
15. Do you blame others for __________’s problems?
16. Do you blame yourself?
17. Are __________’s problems starting to undermine your marriage?
18. Do you find yourself playing detective, fearful of what you may find?
19. Do you go from place to place seeking help for __________?
20. Is concern for __________giving you headaches, stomachaches, or heartache?
Three YES answers: This is an early-warning sign.
Four YES answers: Chances are, you could use some help.
Five or more YES answers: You are definitely in need of help.
- from Families Anonymous literature: "Are You at Your Wit's End?"
